Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Don't eat the birdies.

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It's over. No, not the school year, but the hand-holding that is AP. Test tomorrow. No more seniors at school. Time to metaphorically release the baby birds into the wild and hope they don't get eaten by coyotes. This year has been STRAIGHT UP weird, and I'm exhausted. I'm sad that I won't get to work with some of them anymore--sure--but with everything all smushed up together in time like it is, I'm just glad I can cross one more thing off my life list. I. Am. Tired.

Get them to the test? CHECK. Okay, that happened.

We had an Xbox Dance Central battle in class and I'm proud to say I retained my title of dancingest English teacher at school. It was fun, though it sure made me feel like a out of shape fatty who hasn't done much dancing in the last few years. Phew. I signed yearbooks. I hugged. I offered final bits of advice about the test (and, side note: how weird is it that I'm saying goodbye to these dudes before they take the test? Really weird, that's how weird.) and then I sent them off. Strange how different each group of kids can be.

I don't think people know how much vulnerability there is in teaching. It's hard to let kids know all of you because kids can be fickle and moody, and that means you can get hurt if you take things personally. Toward the end of this year I protected myself a little bit more than I think I set out to, originally. The year ended with me feeling tense and guarded. But those I am close to are going to be "lifers." Things work out as they should, I suppose. People find their way into your life if they're supposed to be there.

I am 100% at that part of the year, though, that's so painful and exhausting that I think I am never going to be able to do this again. Thank God for the blissful forgetting that happens in the summer time. I need summer to reboot before I can handle a new group... but I can't even think about that right now.

Last night Addie and I ate strawberries from our own garden. Yesterday I drove Henry around and he sang "Para-para-paradise..." from Coldplay. We have a baseball game this evening. Life is happening all around me whether I decide to pay attention to it or not. And today, this thing crossed off my list, it's a clear sign that it's almost time to pack up the Mrs. P Show for the year and be me for a few months.

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