Frustration is my middle name. Frustration and exhaustion. I'll have to hyphenate. What sent me into a spin? Our busy weekend, which included two soccer games early Saturday morning, a wonderful retirement party for one of my mentors in the English department on Saturday night (you can read about it here--it was great, but draining), and then two family BBQs yesterday. I was staying up late every night because once I got past the (very) scary and realistic crash scenes in the first two episodes, I've become a total convert to LOST. I trudged through a painful, unmotivated 4-miler on Saturday in the hottest part of the day; I know that's not a lot in real runner distance, but it's pretty far for me still. I ran errands like a madwoman yesterday morning before the barbecues, bought a watermelon I forgot to serve, and I did a half hour of Yoga last night after the rib cook-off even though I'd eaten enough calories to sustain a hippo, three giraffes, and a lemur, and I was pretty sure I was in a meat coma.
blah from Flickr
When I'm in a mood, even great things can add to the frustration. Two of the fabulous things that set me over the edge this morning were two newly redesigned blogs that I read every day--I know that's really petty of me, but I'm just feeling so frustrated with the design aspect of this site. I know I could have someone else do it for me, but I WANT to learn it myself. So for the last few weeks it's just been blank as a 10th grader's brain while I think about what it will be or how I want to change it. But I don't like it looking like this. It's crap. I like the wider columns for larger pictures, but that's it. Anyway, please check out the gorgeous blogs these two ladies have redesigned, Chic Runner (on Wordpress now) and Brunch at Saks (still on blogger, but perfectly designed). I'm sitting here crankying it up because I just want it to be fabulous and I want to not worry about what it looks like so I can focus on what I write. I was thinking that my blog was just going to suck as long as it was on blogger, but Annemarie proved me wrong. I own my own domain, why don't I get my act together and make this site look like something that wasn't slapped together by a third-grader? I want it to be pretty. I want to not think about it. I want to just flit over here and WRITE.
Maybe this will mean that my content will be slightly better than the gutter level standard I've been hitting lately. Do you see what kind of mood I'm in?
I'm sorry. Leave me to my pity party. I think I'm going to sit around in this godawful outfit I'm wearing (gold soffee shorts, too small Walmart orange tank with cinnamon-sugar margarine stuck to the front from the Monkeys' breakfast) with my two inch brown roots and greasy face and last night's mascara under my fingernails (why?) and just wallow in this grump I'm having for a while.
That's all I've got for you this morning.
Edited to add: Since I wrote this, I've been messing with my blog. So if you read it after about 3:00 PM today, you will not know what I was talking about. That's okay.